Dear Disney

 

You do not need to make your characters extra-cute for the Japanese market. 

Look at poor Donald. Where is the sarcastic, lazy, world-weary duck we know and love? You’ve turned him into a super-enthusiastic member of the school band. 

As for Mickey, you’ve robbed the poor bastard of his mouth. 

There’s just no call for this kind of thing. 

 

That is all.

Dear Department Store

 

Where do you get such creepy mannequins? 

I kind of want one. 

 

But not these ones. 

 

They give me nightmares.